The
Alisandra Photography Blog

Ok. Marriage Tuesday this week. Forgive me 🙂

Assuming you have a healthy view of yourself, and a solid grasp on your identity, I will venture to say that there isn’t anything as honest as a mirror.

While we were dating, I quickly picked up on Chad’s love for honesty. He’s honest, sometimes to a fault, but I’d rather that than lies, right?! Now that we’re married, he continues his habit in telling the truth. I realize that my husband is the best mirror I could ask for. Unlike a framed reflective piece of glass that has no sense of who I am, Chad knows my weaknesses, my insecurities, my tendencies… and when he gets ready to compliment or critique me, I know he has those things in the back of his mind. He also has the intention of building me up, or has a hope that I will grow based on what he tells me. There is an indescribable trust and vulnerability that goes into this process. We are not perfect–sometimes I get hurt because of something he says to me. Sometimes it touches a nerve. Sometimes I’m not in the “mood” to hear it. And sometimes the timing is all wrong. But most of the time, I learn more about myself. I see ways that I have fallen short,  and learn ways to become more Christlike. Marriage is like this. You learn a lot about yourself based on your spouse. When they come to you with a critique, don’t immediately retaliate or shut down. You married them, so you clearly trusted them a little. Perhaps what they say has some merit? Perhaps what they say is going to help you grow? If you don’t like what they say, that doesn’t mean it’s not true. Talk it out. Hear what they have to say. Love them for showing you your true colors, even if their colors are a little blotchy themselves.